2:09:00 PM

source: index.hr

Are exes like accessories? Some you keep because they have some meaning even though you know you will not wear them anymore. Others you just hate and think "what was I even thinking?", some you just get rid of...or there are those you put a lot of effort into in order to keep, went to the store to repair some zip, handle, detail...

This morning, after sinfully indulging on a never-ending coffee frappé (damn you 33ºC Barcelona mornings) and a girly talk with my friend Nidia I went home determined to write my thoughts down. After updating each other on current news and whatevs, we started talking about friends, exes, and the kind of relationships you have with people you dated once, if there is any... I couldn't help but wonder, should we completely remove someone (read ex) from your life? Some of our friends have been removed from Facebook by their exes and their reactions were different but they all came down to a certain disappointment (from "i don't care, i just don't know why he did so" to "wtf does he think he is?!").

From that we jumped to our experiences and found out we didn't really delete those people but instead unfollowed them (actually, only ONE certain person) in order to go on without having to force the "unfriend" awkward move but not seeing them appearing on our social media, phones, let alone meeting by chance in their frequented areas. Is that nonsense? OK you might say Lau what's the point of having him as a friend on fb if you blocked him so nothing can appear to your fb page? And don't get me wrong, I am not doing so hoping there is a 5% chance of making amends. 

Some say the best option to start your "moving on" phase is to unfriend your ex. Getting over it, letting go and moving on can be hard, but will you stop thinking about said ex just because you deteleted that person from social media? If there is no bad blood, there is no need to remove someone from your life. If you are still healing and want to try but not sure, try unfollowing... so there is no need to know about unless you type his/her name on the search screen...It helped me (and many i guess?) to avoid certain mood swings and low attitudes of a sudden after seeing something related to him. I just don't think i will get to the "ok" level when it comes to this one, compared to some other past relationship.

If I stop thinking about you, will you be gone to me forever?


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2 comments to blue my mind

  1. Beautifully written! totally agree :)

  2. I've been divorced from my ex-husband since 2012 and I still think about him once in a while. Oddly, I recently re-activated my FB messenger (on my phone) and when I checked it he had actually messaged me back in December 2016. It was the first time he'd reached out to me. He congratulated me on my baby as it was one thing I wanted to do is be a mother. But, he was the one that filed for divorce when I wanted it to work out. He traded me in for a new model, as this was how I felt and still do at times. Now, he's unblocked me from his FB account but reblocked messenger. I guess he blocked me once I didn't answer him. It's really hard. I think moving on after you've given your heart to someone is always hard no matter how long it has been and even if you are both in new relationships.